Prioritzing YOU

From observation I see a trend..from living I know this to be a fact for myself….YOU have to make YOU a priority.

The more love we share with other people the more we find ourselves sacrificing  wants and needs for the greater good of the other person.  In many cases, mothers will just let their dreams vanish so that the daily needs and wants of their children can be met.  I do not disagree with this; however I think that life is about balance.
To cease all former dreams for a relationship or a loved one seems like a torrid fate. It is so much easier to invest in another person when you do not want to be or admit that you could be selfish.  We conform to the Celebrity of today, the Products of tomorrow and the constant void that seers beneath the surface.  One has to wonder why.

Successful people at one time or another have to take a chance.  They have to become a “doer”   They must give into the fear of failure and conquer this head on.  Strife can make you so weak that eventually the Mad Cap Genius emerges; or the desire can become so great that you can not sleep until greatness is acheived.
I honestly think people have invested so much of their own self into a fictional world, trying to keep up with the Jones’ at all costs..and in the end have lost sight of their souls.  There is a depreciating value placed on one’s self when invested in everything but you.  This is not an example of a balanced life.
If you ever watch the Biggest Loser, every contestant has one thing in common…they have escaped their current lives, problems, issues and emotions by binging on all kinds of foods.  They are taken away from their families and people they know for one purpose; to lose weight.  If you do not have the familiar around you, you are forced to finally look at YOU.  Who are you?  What do you represent?
I am a guilty party to all of the above.  I do not have children but am a caretaker of a sick loved one.  It is very easy to let yourself get caught up in the internal conflict of another person’s world.  You forget who you wanted to be; and who you truly can be.
In order for anyone else to ever see all of the many attributes you have to offer YOU must realize them.  You can not take yourself for granted.  Here are things that I think everyone needs.  No matter what your budget.  Work them into your monthly planning.  In order to remain sane I find these things have to happen in order for you to find your way back to YOU.  They are superficial in many instances, but in the current culture that is the West, we need reminders that we are worth it.  To remind us that we are our own person, an extension of family and friends, but in the end we stand alone.

1.  Exercise:  One form or another.  A brisk walk, a kickboxing class, a Jillian Michaels DVD.  Just get up and get moving.  Now.  Not tomorrow.  Not later.  NOW!

2. Meditation: Prayer, Yoga, Reading  YOU time.  Take 10 minutes out of your day (or more) to decompress.  By yourself.  To journal, write your thoughts.  No loud music.  No phones, television, no people around.  Find your center and concentrate.  Picture yourself floating on the ocean.  Sounds, smells around you.  Envision what your life would be like in your nirvana.

3.  Money Management:  In the Recession you need this more than ever.  Money can be your best ally or your worst enemy.  There will never be enough for all of the things you want; so start deciding what you  need.  Become disciplined in your tracking and planning.  The savings will add up.  I always include Savings and then a Reward Savings.  Reward Savings are for those things YOU personally want. One thing each paycheck (no matter how small) for yourself.

4.  Grooming Appointments:  Do NOT miss a hair appointment.  Do not let yourself go.  Work with your Stylist or find a less expensive one.  Save for this appointment.  Skip meals if you must but while you sit in that chair you will find that YOU are a priority. This is not limited to just haircuts and color…waxing one’s eyebrows etc falls in this category.

5. Beauty Regime:  There is nothing that brings you closer to you than spending time on personal grooming.  Multi Task if you must, but make sure you work on you daily.  Your self respect will teach your children that they must respect themselves as well.  Good habits breed good habits.  Change anything you would not want your children to be, see or know…NOW!

6.  Dentist Appointments/Medical Appointments:  Do not miss these.  Ever.  Not your children’s appointments.  Yours.  The thing I respect the most about my mom and sister is that they consistently do things that some will not do because they have lost who they are.

7.  Hobby Day:  One day a month, whether it be a weekend or a weekday..find one thing that you LOVE to do.  Invite people along if you must.  This can come in the form of rafting, hiking, climbing, tennis, gardening, blogging, scrapbooking…anything you enjoy…do it.  Practice makes perfect.  Find your niche.  Something that relaxes you and gives you a sense of self.

8.  Something New:  Try at least one new thing per month.  Recipes, books, sports….anything.  Make a list of your fears and conquer them.  Baby steps until you find you.  Everyone around you will take notice.  If they do not, who cares? You had enough respect for yourself to do the things you could not du.  Challenge yourself to learn at least one new thing. Whether it be a History Fact or a new Language.  Do it for you.

9. Purge:  Once a month (maybe even a week) find one thing you do not need and throw it away.  This can come in the form of organizing one drawer or your purse; but find something you do not use, do not want…and get rid of it….NOW
10.  Relationships:  Your relationship with yourself is the most important.  Your relationship to your soul and not your mind will be the empowerment you need to become whole.  Many people refer to their Souls as Spiritual Entities…some even believe the Soul is what connects us to God and Higher Beings.  Work on this relationship.  The rest will fall into place.  Remember that sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.  People are responsible for their actions and thoughts.  Learn how to control yours, or mold it into the things you can’t regret.

2009.08.10. Tags: Self Improvement. Uncategorized. Leave a comment.